I actually wrote this post a few weeks ago but didn’t have a chance to post it. I am no longer on crutches, but this story I think illuminates some of the challenges I was faced with.
I have been cleaning out my study over the last few weeks for the first time in…well, a really long time. I know that I unpacked when FH and I moved in to our house four or five years ago. But since then, I kind of abandoned the room.
Going through all this stuff has been kind of a fun experience though. It’s almost like treasure hunting, really. Well, if your definition of treasure can be loosely interpreted. For example, I found a baggie FULL of those little nubs you put in bookcases to help hold up shelves. I was so excited to find this because I have several shelves that are precariously balanced in my library and could use the reinforcement. Plus I’m a dork.
During this process I did post a few questions on the internet about how long various items last. I was curious just how long lip-gloss lasts. Or chocolate. Or lotion. Because I found a box from high school with all of the above in it. I was told that the lotion should be fine, but that any food from high school should be thrown away and to not put on the lip-gloss from high school under any circumstances. Apparently lip-gloss does not have a ten-year shelf life. Who knew?
I did find a lot of interesting things in my collection. There was a lot of stuff that I wasted babysitting money on when I was a kid. This includes such things as solid incense that is meant to be burnt over hot coals. When did I ever think I was going to use this? Plus I bought a lot of fragrant oils and stuff which ended up spilling all over everything so all my incense related stuff was sticky.
This big attempt to clean out my study was over the last few weeks. There is still a lot to do, but my desk has been cleared off and that was my main goal as I have been working at my desk during knee surgery recovery.
I was sitting here working and realized my hands felt really dry. So I dug out one of the bottles of lotion that I had uncovered during my cleaning earlier. I opened it up and it was more liquid than anything else, so I shook it up and poured a big glob on my hand. And it STANK! Oh my gosh, I never knew lotion could stink so bad!!! It was so bad that the dog actually woke up from his nap and came over to smell my hands and made a face. The same face he makes when I take off my nail polish.
So now I had terribly stinky lotion all over my hands and I had to find a solution. I can’t just walk into the other room and wash my hands because I am on crutches still. I don’t want to wipe my hands off on my jeans because then I’ll have to wash them and who knows if the smell will actually get out!?! I grab a tissue and smear off as much as I can before crutching to the bathroom to wash my hands off (twice). I picked out some lotion that is only like two years old, so it’s fine and stuffed it in my back pocket and crutched back to my study. Once I realized the stink of the lotion was still hanging around in my room, I decided to light some of my incense from high school.
So I dig out one of the tiny matchboxes I had found. It was pretty nice, and I think I picked it up in Germany the last time I was there. I pull out one match and strike it. The head falls off. I pick up another and the same thing happens. And another. At this point there are only a few matches left in this matchbox, but I don’t trust them anyway so I pick up another matchbook I had found and luckily this match works the first time I strike. I guard the flame from the breeze my ceiling fan is giving off, but I am able to pull through in the end and light the incense. My room already smells better. And I’ve learned an important lesson. Some things do not last forever. Like lip-gloss. Or lotion. It DOES go bad!